I have been doing a lot of thinking. Probably too much. But I thought I'd share my thoughts because they're doing no good staying in one place.
I have really been thinking about the power of kindness. Genuine kindness. I have been thinking about those who are suffering, which qualifies all of us as no one is exempt from the trials, tribulations, and temptations this life offers. It always seems there are those who have bigger trials. Always.
I still hurt. I still miss my baby. I think I will always hurt. I know I will always miss her. It's painful. And yet in my hurt and sorrow I am able to move forward, always remembering. I know you know this because I always seem to relate everything in my life to Mercydez. I guess it's because she is that significant in my life. She literally changed me. How could I not think of her in everything?!
Last night I had some "scars", if you will, re-opened. I read the blog of a sweet family going through the trial and deep sorrow of having a chronically ill child. I laid on my bed and cried. Harder then I have in a few months. It's not fun re-opening wounds. But I know there is knowledge and peace in re-visiting the vulnerability, the feeling of no control, the ache and literal pain of watching. This blog was hard to read. How I want to SAVE THIS FAMILY. I want to help their little girl, Layla Grace. I want to take her suffering from her and take it upon myself.
I also have a precious friend, my sweet, priceless Grandmother, who is suffering a lot of pain right now. My cousin, Sheila, wrote on her facebook status last night, "Watched over my sick little ninety-year-old grandmother tonight while my parents went out. There is nothing harder than watching someone you love very dearly suffer in noble silence. There is also nothing more inspiring than watching someone who can smile at you through the pain--and mean it."
I used to think disappointment was the worst feeling in the world. I have come to learn disappointment doesn't come close to watching someone suffer.
But with that thought in mind, I want you to think with me. Are we really helpless towards those who are suffering? Are our hands really tied? Is there NOTHING we can do to help with the suffering?
My answer to those three questions is a big fat N.O. There is something we can do. Our hands aren't tied. There is something we can do to help with the pain. Wanna know what it is?
Genuinely love them. Genuinely serve them. Anyone, even someone suffering, can SMELL "superficial" as it walks through the door. AND! Anyone, even someone suffering, can smell "genuine".
I am still learning people are the way they are for a reason. That angry person you just walked by is angry for a reason. That insecure woman in the office or classroom is insecure for a reason. That annoying, self-centered acquaintance is annoying and self-centered for a reason! No one is exempt from "life". Lets love them. Let's give them the benefit of doubt. Let's give them a chance. They need it.
There are many suffering in "noble silence". I sincerely challenge you to find one of them each day and offer genuine kindness. Smile. Hug. Offer loving words. You may honestly be the reason that person is able to smile and mean it.
If it is you who is suffering in "noble silence"...mmmmmm. You are loved and cared about. I can sincerely say you are loved.
This is my truth.
Paris Part Three
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